This involves seven important steps:

• Contracting and Commitment
• Information Gathering and Assessment
• Education
• Healing
• Problem Solving
• Closure 
• An ongoing process of coaching for the pastor and, potentially, other key leaders is also a typical part of the process.

The circumstances within which the congregational mediation process makes the most sense include: 

1. a fairly high and wide-spread level of anxiety in the congregation; 
2. the need to make some win-win decisions regarding issues of disagreement facing the congregation; 
3. the need to address hurts in interpersonal relationships in the congregation in a healing manner; 
4. a need to bring closure to unresolved hurts from the past (both recent and more distant), so as to prevent the recurrence of destructive, multi-generational conflict patterns in the future.

This process typically takes from six to twelve months to complete. Before entering such an intensive process, LMPC asks for an expression of support from congregational membership. In churches that operate according to a congregational polity system, this is usually done by a congregational vote of those present at an officially called congregational meeting; LMPC would want to have a vote whereby at least 67% of those present and voting express their support for undertaking the congregational mediation process.

In churches where the official leadership board has the authority to make such decisions — including the authority to commit significant funding — we still want to ensure that there is broad congregational support for that decision. In such cases, we use a survey form — composed of continuum questions — that is passed out at an officially called congregational meeting where we've explained the process to members and answered their questions about it. We would want to ensure that there is something approaching 67% of the members who attend such a meeting who would indicate their commitment to support the leadership board's decision to undertake the congregational mediation process.

LMPC staff invests substantial on-site time in the congregational mediation process. The education phase includes two weekend workshops (described below). The information-gathering phase entails several steps, including a series of ninety-minute small-group sessions during which the interests of participants are recorded for problem solving later in the process. The healing phase usually includes two five-hour sessions held on Saturdays to work at neutralizing history. The problem-solving phase also includes two five-hour, Saturday sessions. It all concludes with a closing service of reconciliation. Additional on-site time may be involved, if further coaching with the pastor or consultation with leaders — or if interpersonal mediation with key individuals — is needed.

The congregational mediation process is designed to involve the entire congregation. The participation and support of key leaders, including the pastor, is crucial. All members are encouraged to attend the educational events, one of the small group sessions, and all the large-group healing and problem-solving sessions.

While higher levels of anxiety or more significant hurts may be present among a segment of the congregation, they sometimes do not characterize the congregation as a whole. In such situations, and after careful assessment involving LMPC staff, an alternative to a full-scale congregational mediation process involving a smaller group of members, or a particular segment of the congregation, may be designed and implemented. While such a process follows the same basic steps of the congregational mediation process of contracting, information gathering, education, healing, problem-solving, closing phases — it involves fewer participants and, typically, requires less time and expense.

However, caution should be exercised in choosing to pursue the smaller group mediation option because of expediency, when what is really warranted by the situation is a full-scale congregational mediation process. That is, for any consultation process to be effective, all parties who have been impacted by past conflicts, all parties who have the potential to be impacted by the outcome of the process, that is any agreements reached or decisions made within the context of the process, and all patties who have the potential to block the implementation of the outcome of the process should be involved in the process.

Moreover, even in a smaller group mediation process, there is a need to ensure that people representing all of the various perspectives on the issues facing the congregation are included in the process. Prior to initiating the mediation process, the leadership board would need to secure the commitment to participate from those who would best be involved in the process. It would be important to include people impacted by the conflict who hold diverse perspectives on the issues being faced, including those who are neutral or more moderate in their views, since such people can have a moderating influence on those who are polarized. Finally, people serving in significant, formal positions of leadership, as well as those who hold informal positions of leadership in the congregation should be involved in the process as well.

When intensity within a congregation is not at a particularly high level, there is another alternative to the congregational mediation process that is worth exploring: providing a series of two educational workshops, in conjunction with a process of periodic coaching for congregational leaders and the pastor.

The two workshops we recommend are: Healthy Congregations, followed some weeks later by Conflict in the Church: Entrusted with the Message of Reconciliation. The workshops would be valuable for anyone in the congregation, although leaders and those involved in any conflicts should be particularly encouraged to attend.

The consultation process for the pastor could begin prior to the educational workshops. This coaching process would focus on assisting the pastor's efforts to understand and manage his or her own functioning as a key leader in the congregational system. The consultation process for congregational fay leaders would be in tandem with the educational workshops. The focus would be on empowering leaders to implement the workshop leanings and to work at institutionalizing healthy conflict transformation procedures for the future.

The combined education and more limited consultation process can be effective in lieu of a congregational mediation process in contributing to more healthy congregational functioning when three conditions are met: 

1. there is not widespread, high-level anxiety within the congregation, nor is there an accumulation of hurts in need of healing; 
2. lay leadership and pastor are relatively unified; 
3. lay leadership and pastor are committed to doing the hard work of implementing the workshop learnings afterward.

One or both of the two workshops described above (Healthy Congregations and Conflict in the Church: Entrusted with the Message of Reconciliation) are often used as freestanding educational events by congregations. This option is often pursued by churches when anxiety is relatively low in the congregation with no significant need for healing in relationships.

The benefit of such workshops is that they can equip congregational leaders to put limits on invasive, destructive behaviors, and, thereby, prevent destructive conflict from emerging in the future. The workshops can also equip leaders with skills for addressing conflicts in a problem-solving way at an early level of intensity, so that the intensity level does not escalate to the point of creating division and polarization in the church.

In some cases, where a church is hesitant to engage the full-scale congregational mediation process — even though the situation clearly points to the need for that process—contracting for the two workshops can be an initial step that ultimately leads to helping people see the need to undertake the full-scale process.

LMPC, at times, will lead restorative conversations when a congregation needs to have a difficult conversation that requires an outside facilitator to guide the conversation. This intervention is recommended when a congregation has experienced a particularly painful event and desires a conversation where members can talk through the pain and grief of the event, hear from one another, process the event as a group together, and move forward in a unified manner. In addition, a restorative conversation can be utilized when there is a desire to hear from one another on a difficult or polarizing topic, not as a means of arguing positions, but to share one’s concerns and thoughts and interests. 

In a smaller group, LMPC implements a Circle Process; in a larger group, LMPC implements a Fishbowl Circle, often referred to as a Samoan Circle. The intention of the circle is to give individuals an opportunity to have agency and speak from their hearts on important matters in supportive and respectful ways. Restorative conversations are not a substitute for mediation.

When a congregation is discerning to make a major decision, and there are significant differences around the issue, LMPC can facilitate a process that engages members and leads toward a satisfactory resolution for a majority of the congregation. Consulting with a specially appointed discernment committee of the church, LMPC designs an Agreement on Procedures that details the steps and timeline of the discernment process, giving congregants an opportunity to understand the complexity of the issue and a chance to share their perspective to shape a final proposal, leading up to an informed vote. This process usually includes an educational component, small-group sessions, a written report and a final proposal. An Agreement on Procedure can be useful when discerning to merge a congregation, build a new fellowship hall, become an open-and-affirming congregation, etc.  

Finally, even when a congregation chooses not to invite on-site work by LMPC, pastors can benefit from ongoing telephone coaching with LMPC staff. Using a case study format, the pastor would schedule consultation sessions focused on specific congregational situations and how he/she can manage self more effectively in those situations. The coaching process is grounded in Bowen family systems theory and how such emotional process dynamics play out in congregational life. Such coaching can be particularly useful when pastors simultaneously attend LMPC's Clergy Clinic in Family Emotional Process.